Tuesday, March 15, 2016

Trust God's Heart

(A driftwood cross at Zihuatanejo Christian Fellowship)

I was looking at my journal this morning from three years ago. I was in a very dark place and I was astounded to see how close I was clinging to God. I wanted to share them with you because sometimes we have a hard time trusting God's heart and His intentions for us when we are facing giant losses and not seeing much gain.

Here it goes...

"I am trusting Your heart. the heart that loved rebellious Israelites. the heart that forgave David after he sinned with Bathsheba. The heart that kept Dave's line till the Messiah came. the heart that heard his people's cries and set them free. the heart that gave them a promised land of their very own. the heart who helped them to not be afraid to take over impossibly fortified cities. 

You are gracious, compassionate, merciful, mighty, forgiving, loving, kind, methodical, righteous, holy, gentle, DANGEROUS, UNPREDICTABLE, eternal, pure, lovely, FULL of HOPE. You faithfully keep your promises to me and my family. I love you so much. Help me to love you more."

 

There were days I felt I would never laugh again. Now look at me. I am not fear-filled for the future of my children. I am not paralyzed with it. I am not trying to control the future. I am not comparing myself to other "super-moms". I am not relying on a formula that seems to work for someone else's family. Instead, I am trusting my GOOD God to work this all out. I am expecting great things from him. I am expecting that the seeds of love, and God's Truth will grow in my children and will effect the choices they make as they grow and mature.

I ran into this verse after doing "Breaking Free" Bible study probably 13 years ago. It was powerful then, but now that I am on the other side of this trial, it means so much more.

"And provide for those who grieve in Zion-to bestow on them a crown of beauty instead of ashes, the oil of gladness instead of mourning, and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair. They will be called oaks of righteousness, a planting of the Lord for the display of His splendor. They will rebuild the ancient ruins and restore the places long devastated; they will renew the ruined cities that have been devastated for generations." Isaiah 61:3-4

4 comments:

Becky L. said...

thanks for sharing your journal writings and your heart with your readers. So thankful you are laughing again and have no fear. Recently I was reading a scripture where Jesus said not to have fear in your hearts. I've taken that to heart as I've had fear in certain instances. I remember His words and it frees me. Hugs and continue to be strong in His word.
Becky

Cheesemakin' Mamma said...

I love this, and I LOVE that picture! There were days I thought I'd never see you laugh again, too. And look at us, laughing together again like two sisters oughta! I had so much fun watching those Studio C videos with you this week. It felt good to laugh so hard with you. God is so good!

Amber said...

I had definitely noticed you clinging to Him during that time when I would drop in and read. I love this post and am so encouraged!

Stacie, A Firefighter's Wife said...

Thank you ladies

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