Tuesday, April 17, 2012
A New Beginning- We Are Still Standing
I made it a personal prayer in my journal.
"Will the Lord reject us forever? Will He ever show his favor again? has His unfailing love vanished forever? Has His promise failed for all time? Has God forgotten to be merciful? Has he in anger withheld his compassion?
Then I thought, "To this I will appeal: The years of the right hand of the most High."
I will remember the deeds of the Lord; yes, I remember Your miracles of long ago (I thought often about how You delivered the Israelites through the Red Sea). I meditated on all Your works. I clung to them Lord! I considered all of Your mighty deeds.
I found out Your ways are holy. What God is so great as our God? You are the God who performs miracles; You display the power among your peoples. With Your mighty arm You redeem Your people, Your descendants of Jacob and Joseph...
Your path, led through the sea, Your way through the MIGHTY waters. Though Your footprints were not seen. Oh Lord, I could not see Your footprints. I couldn't see what You were doing, yet I trusted You. Without a word, you fought our battle. You will restore us. You will heal us.
I feel like I have been on the verge of drowning. Every now and then, I would get to the surface to gasp enough air for the next round under the waves. Today, my head feels like it is above the water for good. I feel no fear, only trust in a God whose ways are not our ways. I know God will redeem this situation if we let it. I know that my children will come to know Him even better because of what we have been through.
I sat through a worship service last Sunday and it was the first one in three months that I didn't sob the whole way through the music. God is healing our hearts and if we let Him, He will use our situation to warn others about the addictive nature of pornography.
Satan has tried to destroy our family, but it will come back on his head a thousand times over. What He meant for evil, God will turn into good.
Please watch your kids. Don't assume that just because they are homeschooled that they would not look up porn. Just because they don't have an I-Phone, or they have all Christian friends and activities, doesn't mean they are not curious. Curiosity can lead into a full-blown addiction. We had no idea. The consequences of this addiction are enormous. Because of some of the choices my son has made, he will no longer be able to live with us. We are grateful to my father and stepmother who have taken him in. He will be starting a treatment program soon and we have high hopes that he will have the motivation to complete it. We have had to let go of raising our son at the tender age of 13. Never in my wildest dreams could I have imagined it, yet this is our reality.
If you have been in a similar situation and would like to talk about it you can email me privately.
Truth was revealed. God will not allow sin to continue if you continue to pray for it to be rooted out. I prayed those hard prayers for my kids. "Do what it takes". The pain and cost of it was more than I could have ever imagined. But now God can use it in a mighty way. To warn others so that the church will be called to repentence and obedience. For there will be no revival without those two things. If we continue in our sin, then we are white-washed tombs. Decaying on the inside, beautiful on the outside. Let it not be said of us! Let us meet this challenge head-on, so that we do not lose this generation for the Lord.