When a reproof is done privately with gentleness and with the motive of restoring the other person, then the reproof is loving. When a person won't reprove their partner, they are, most likely, more concerned about "What effect is this going to have on me?" rather than being concerned about helping their partner. This kind of reaction is selfish and unloving. If they love God and their partner, they will, in a righteous way, biblically reprove each other in love.
How you respond to your husband's reproof is a reflection of your desire to become more godly. Begin with considering his reproof to be, at the least, possibly valid. Next, consider the following right ways to respond to reproof.
The Right Way to Respond to Reproof...
1. Take the time to think about what you have been told.
The heart of the righteous ponder how to answer, but the mouth of the wicked pours out evil things. -Proverbs 15:28
2. Search the Scriptures to determine what the sin is and how to "put it off."
...lay aside the old self, which is being corrupted in accordance with the lusts of deceit, and that you be renewed in the spirit of your mind, and put on the new self...-Ephesians 4:22-24
3. Ask your husband husband to give specific examples of how you could have better responded to his reproof.
4. Confess your sin.
5. Show the fruit of repentance. Stop doing the sin and start doing the right thing.
6. Do not justify or defend yourself.
If you know that your husband's reproof is valid or even partially valid then heed his advice and change your sinful way.
Listen and learn from the reproof. Think, "What is God trying to teach?" Learn to see each other's reproofs from God's perspective and be grateful that your husband is telling his complaint instead of clamming up and becoming embittered because of your sin.
Taken from the "Excellent Wife" by Martha Pierce.
As I read this passage, I was so convicted. I couldn't believe that she was challenging me to actually be GRATEFUL for my husband for getting after me. I am always defensive, thinking that his sins are so much worse than mine. I have a very bad habit of disregarding anything he has to say to me if he does not do it gently or humbling.
After reading this section, I had the opportunity to put this into practice. My husband was upset at me for something and instead of getting defensive, I actually stopped, took a deep breath and listened (can you hear the angels singing?). I thought through what he was saying and examined it to see if there was any truth to it. I found that there was. I stopped thinking about all the things that he wasn't doing right and stopped to worry about me. I apologized and told him that now that I am aware of the problem, I will try not to do it. We even came up with some strategies for change. Because I was open to change, I was able to say some hard stuff to him. We both grew that day!
"Show me your way , oh Lord, teach me Your paths; guide me in Your truth and teach me for you are God my Savior, and my hope is in You all day long." -Psalm 25:4-5 My Mission for this BLOG is to bring glory to God as I share what He is teaching me as I raise my children for Him. I want to encourage mothers all around the world to hang in there! Motherhood is tough, challenging and gritty. But through Christ's strength and the support of other moms who are in the trenches, I will keep pressing towards the goal to raise Godly children. Please feel free to leave comments. It blesses me so much! You can also email me at firstname.lastname@example.org
I am a Stay-At-Home mother of six children. We LOVE having a large family. My first love, is Christ and the Words of the Bible. My passion is to teach my children about the Lord. I love to watch my children discover their own faith in God. My husband has been a firefighter for over 20 years and is now an officer. I am very proud of him. I long to be a Titus 2 woman who encourages other women to love their husbands and children and to thrive in their homes, not just survive.
The noblest calling in the world is that of a mother. True motherhood is the most beautiful of all arts, the greatest of all professions. She who can paint a masterpiece or who can write a book that will influence millions deserves the plaudits and admiration of mankind; but she who rears successfully a family of healthy, beautiful sons and daughters whose immortal souls will be exerting an influence throughout the ages long after paintings shall have faded, and books and statues shall have been destroyed, deserves the highest honor that man can give. -David O. McKay Motherhood is the one thing in all the world which most truly exemplifies the God-given virtues of creating and sacrficing. Though it carries the woman close to the brink of death, motherhood also leads her into the very realm of the fountians of life and makes her co-partner with the Creator in bestowing upon eternal spirits mortal life. -David O McKay We can't form our children on our own concepts; we must take them and love them as God gives them to us. -Johann Wolfgang von Goethe Lo, children are a heritage of the Lord; and the fruit of the womb is his reward. -Psalm 127:3 The mother's heart is the child's schoolroom -Henry Ward Beecher The art of mothering is to teach the art of living to children. -Elaine Heffner People who say they sleep like babies usually don't have them. -Leo J. Burke
To be a mother is a woman's greatest vocation in life. She is a partner with God. No being has a position of such power and influence. She holds in her hands the destiny of nations, for to her comes the responsibility and opportunity of molding the nation's citizens. -Spencer W. Kimball