Thursday, February 10, 2011

How to Deal With Ungodly Husbands

"Because marriage, more than any other relationship, reflects God's involvement with us and bears more potential to draw our hearts to heaven, it can more readily give us a taste of hell." -Dan Allender and Tremper Longman III

Strong words, but for many women this rings true. It isn't a taste of heaven. It is a process in which they find themselves in the need of being "undone" by God. They have to look at a difficult marriage as a long-term course in developing their own good character.

I was super-impressed with this article by Andrea, a writer for "At the Well". Here is the link to it . It is a testimony and an encouragement for those wives who do not have the perfect, godly husband who "washes her daily in the Word".

I think sometimes women can get very discouraged by reading all the perfect blogs with the perfect husbands and children. It can be deflating when they get off the computer and face the messiness in their lives and their relationships. The enemy can actually use it to beat us up.

Be blessed! There is something you can do to escape this spirit of defeat. Check it out ladies! It will be worth it.


Rachel and Family said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Rachel and Family said...

I read the link. Very good. I have had a lot of reflection and pondering on a covenant that I made that feels like marriage to me. But as far as marriage goes, here's my two cents:
I wonder if as, "good Christians" we quit looking at the reality of life: one of which being that some marriages are over long before the government grants an official divorce. God hates divorce, but He also so LOVES us, and if some people are truly suffering in their marriage, than how is it fair to lock someone into a life of abuse. The Pharisees were so caught up in the "law" that they would rather allow people to suffer than to bring healing. I think it takes real wisdom and selfless discernment and pleading to know... do I bend or break? The other thing I thought when I read that is about how angry I would be if my daughter's husband was a pig ;)

Rachel and Family said...

Sorry, I deleted my first comment, too many words!! (As usual, when will I learn?!?)

Love ya Stacie.

Jenn said...

Yes, this was a good article wasn't it!

Wanting What I Have said...

That was a great article! I am learning, especially in the last few years, that God is so much more concerned with my holiness than my happiness. Marriage has been a huge part of learning that. I am so glad you shared! Thanks!

Stacie, A Firefighter's Wife said...

This is what the author says as a disclaimer: (Disclaimer: Please note that the title of this post is “When Your Husband Isn’t Godly,” not “When Your Husband is Abusive.” I do not even pretend to be qualified to address that scenario. If you are in an abusive situation, please seek help immediately.)

I think this is wise advice.

debylynne said...

dear stacie
thank you for posting this. i will confess that as a reader of the blogs i am sometimes "disheartened", rather than encouraged when i come away from them. i know the point is not to lay out all the dirty laundry, but sometimes they just don't feel REAL. i am older woman and i am blessed with a loving,if imperfect :) Christian husband, but i have lived through very hard hard places that didn't fit the "everything is just joy joy joy" that we might sometimes be led to believe the Christian life is all about when we read some of the, thank you - i had already read the titus 2 post and thought it was very good - but, thank you for pointing out the fact that sometimes we need to be a little more real with one another - for the sake of the suffering........

Cheesemakin' Mamma said...

Excellent article!

Stacie, A Firefighter's Wife said...


Thank you so much for commenting. I appreciate your insight. I agree we must be care to not husband bash, but we also cannot build our image to where it isn't real. I try to be as real as I can without hurting others.

His bondservant said...

Excellent article Stacie...marriage is definitely hard work...even for those of us who seem to have the "perfect" husbands. There is no such thing...just like I am certainly not the perfect wife. We are sinners saved by grace and we must always keep in mind that what we do in marriage reflects Christ and His church. Thanks for this my friend!

Camille said...

Thank you for the link Stacie...I think the author of that post had much wisdom in writing it. I agree that we ought to be real, but we ought also to protect and not malign anyone...especially the husband that God gave us...YES...that God GAVE us! How wonderful it is to realise that we are all sinners saved by grace and much of our issues come from our own sinful heart. We are responsible for how we respond and live our lives before our Heavenly Father. No matter how you slice has its difficulties as well as its joys...none of us is immune. Might the LORD indeed be glorified in all we do and say.

Many blessings to you my friend!

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