It is so easy to want a cushy life when it comes to parenting. You want to be served, not the other way around. It is the brackish sin of self-entitlement.
The book, The Age of Opportunity by Paul David Tripp has some wonderful insight to this problem. He says, “I am afraid that many of us live for comfort and bring this entitlement mentality to our parenting. We reason that we have the right to quiet, harmony, peace, and respect, and we respond in anger when we do not get it. Parents who demand comfort, ease, regularity, peace, space, quiet, and harmony will be ill-equipped for this spiritual battle that is raging for our children’s hearts. They will begin to see their child as the enemy, they will begin to fight with him rather than for him, and even worse, they will tend to forget the true nature of the battle and the identity of the real enemy. They will act out of frustrated desire, doing and saying regrettable things, and they will fail to be effective and productive in those strategic moment of ministry in which God has placed them.”
As parents, we are also guilty of having silly expectations when it comes to our children showing us appreciation. We wonder when we are going to get some of the credit for all the sacrificial things that we do for them, such as sitting season after season in snow, rain, wind and heat to watch them play their favorite sport. Will we receive thanks for endless taxiing to this event or that event? Will they come up and give us a joyful hug when we hand them yet another basket of clean laundry? Will they compliment us on cooking thousands of healthy, well-balanced meals throughout their childhood? HELLO! I don’t think so!!!
David Paul Tripp goes on to say, “I cannot tell you how many times I’ve heard parts of this list recited to me by parents, always with the same final punch line. ‘Isn’t about time I get some credit?’ It seems logical, so harmless, so right. Children should appreciate their parents. Yet being appreciated cannot be our goal. When it becomes the thing we live for, we will unwittingly look with hyper-vigilant eyes for appreciation in every situation.
Teenagers don’t often burst in the door at the end of the day and say, ‘Do you know what I was thinking about on the bus ride home today, Mom? I was thinking about how much you and Dad have done for me over the years. You have been with me and for me from the very moment of my life until now. On the bus I was flooded with gratitude and just couldn’t wait to get home and say thank you!’ If this happens to you, erect stones as a lasting memorial, or light an eternal flame!
Very few parents have headed to bed only to hear sobbing coming from their teenage daughter’s bedroom and had this conversation. ‘What’s wrong, Dear?’ ‘Oh, I was just thinking about you and Mom and how unthankful I’ve been. I feel so guilty that I haven’t appreciated you more, and I’ve committed myself to demonstrating that I appreciate you ever day!’ On the contrary, the trend for teenagers is to be much more filled with self-orientation and self-interest than to be filled with an awareness and appreciate of others.
If this is the mentality that parents have, then they will struggle a lot with discouragement and anger during the teen years.”
We need to be asking ourselves these questions:
1. Why am I doing what I am doing?
2. Who am I serving?
3. What are the things that I have come to expect and demand?
4. Whose desires rule the moments of opportunity with my child-God’s or mine?
"Show me your way , oh Lord, teach me Your paths; guide me in Your truth and teach me for you are God my Savior, and my hope is in You all day long." -Psalm 25:4-5 My Mission for this BLOG is to bring glory to God as I share what He is teaching me as I raise my children for Him. I want to encourage mothers all around the world to hang in there! Motherhood is tough, challenging and gritty. But through Christ's strength and the support of other moms who are in the trenches, I will keep pressing towards the goal to raise Godly children. Please feel free to leave comments. It blesses me so much! You can also email me at email@example.com
I am a Stay-At-Home mother of six children. We LOVE having a large family. My first love, is Christ and the Words of the Bible. My passion is to teach my children about the Lord. I love to watch my children discover their own faith in God. My husband has been a firefighter for over 20 years and is now an officer. I am very proud of him. I long to be a Titus 2 woman who encourages other women to love their husbands and children and to thrive in their homes, not just survive.
The noblest calling in the world is that of a mother. True motherhood is the most beautiful of all arts, the greatest of all professions. She who can paint a masterpiece or who can write a book that will influence millions deserves the plaudits and admiration of mankind; but she who rears successfully a family of healthy, beautiful sons and daughters whose immortal souls will be exerting an influence throughout the ages long after paintings shall have faded, and books and statues shall have been destroyed, deserves the highest honor that man can give. -David O. McKay Motherhood is the one thing in all the world which most truly exemplifies the God-given virtues of creating and sacrficing. Though it carries the woman close to the brink of death, motherhood also leads her into the very realm of the fountians of life and makes her co-partner with the Creator in bestowing upon eternal spirits mortal life. -David O McKay We can't form our children on our own concepts; we must take them and love them as God gives them to us. -Johann Wolfgang von Goethe Lo, children are a heritage of the Lord; and the fruit of the womb is his reward. -Psalm 127:3 The mother's heart is the child's schoolroom -Henry Ward Beecher The art of mothering is to teach the art of living to children. -Elaine Heffner People who say they sleep like babies usually don't have them. -Leo J. Burke
To be a mother is a woman's greatest vocation in life. She is a partner with God. No being has a position of such power and influence. She holds in her hands the destiny of nations, for to her comes the responsibility and opportunity of molding the nation's citizens. -Spencer W. Kimball