Thursday, August 19, 2010

Expect Rebellion? From Stacie's Devotional Archive

Dear Mothers,

I recently read an article that really got me thinking. The author said that before her and her husband got married she made a flippant statement that said something like “Oh, all teenagers rebel, I’m sure ours will too”. She then said, “He announced back to ME, that no, our future kids did NOT need to be rebellious and that if we trained them up in the Lord, we could skip all that rebellious nonsense.” This man blew off the world’s thinking and decided that this was not going to be the case in his home. I really admire and respect that.

Do we just expect our children to rebel when they become teenagers? I know I’ve been scared into thinking that. How about this, instead of expecting them to rebel, we do everything we can to think positively and to pray that our children won’t fall into that pit.

The author (Gena Suarez) quotes the following…”You want the "secret?" Here it is: Shelter them. They're yours, gifted by God. Train them up in the admonition of the Lord. Keep them near you. Expect obedience, insist on it. Hold them accountable. Give them lots of responsibilities - and plenty of space. But keep your eyeballs fastened tightly to that space. The key is relationship, too. Be interested in them. Let them drone on and on about their latest software application or musical composition. Love them but not as a pansy best friend. Love them with strength and resolve. With seriousness, firmness. They'll thank you for it later, and you will be blessed. God's way (His word) is always the best way.”

I only have one more year until I enter into this new phase of  parenting teenagers. I want to pray for the best and wait expectantly for it to pass! If we already “know” they are going to rebel as teenagers, then we are already living in defeat! Speak truth into their lives. Speak truth into your life! For Satan would love nothing better then to already defeat us before the real battle has even begun for the souls of your children.

From One Mom to Another,

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kathy said...

So true Stacie!

Anonymous said...

We've never expected that our children would rebel- and so far none have. I never thought of parenting that way. I believe that children test their parents at all ages as they mature, seeing how far they can go with this or that- Making it important to never let the guard down! The key is consistancy.

Robin said...

I think some of the issue lies in our definition of rebellion.
I truly believe that a child who isn't respected and allowed to make decisions for himself will grow toward a period of rebelliousness simply out of a desire to feel as if he has some control over his decisions.
I've always operated from the mindset that the kids need lots and lots of control from parents when they're little. With each passing year we should lighten up on our control over them and hand more and more of it over to them.
Every mistake and bad choice they make while living under my roof is a chance for them to develop a better capacity to control themselves at the time of life when all of their choices are theirs to make without intervention from me.

I do know a little of what I'm preaching. A little. My oldest leaves for college in 8 days. I'm a mess emotionally - but I feel good that he has handled his freedom well over these last 3 years at home.
I'm also mindful of the reality that he's capable of making decisions that have no reflection on how he was parented. *gulp*
I lean toward keeping the heart strings tied so that when a bad decision is made they will feel safe coming to me or their Dad to try and sort it out.

Anonymous said...

I have an award for you at my blog because you have been so kind to me.


Lou said...

Love your blog, Stacie! It's my first time visiting.

Good post. My boys are still several years from being teenagers, but those years still frighten me all the same. :)

It's difficult as parents to ensure we're making the right decisions. My parents were great parents at home-- gave my sister and I the freedom to be who we were without giving us the freedom to do things that we shouldn't. Yet, my sister turned out to be a saint in her teenaged years and I did exactly what I knew I shouldn't-- took a path that really hurt them and wasn't good for me either. I was just a kid but still old enough to understand the consequences of my decisions. I've never blamed their parenting style for my poor decisions. They were GREAT parents, still are.

Great post. Lots of things to think about!


I am blessed! said...

I'm reminded of young men in the Bible like Daniel, Hananiah, Azariah, and Mishael who gave glory to God in a wicked culture that persecuted them. Also- the young pastor Timothy. And many otehrs. If you think about it, Hebrew boys were considered to become men at the age of 13. We're living in a time of delayed maturity. Many 30 yr old men are still not ready to settle down and support a family. This is contributing greatly to the downfall of our society. I agree with you- I do NOT expect my kids to rebel as teens, but to be used mightily by the Lord. I want them to surrender to Him whole heartedly- all of their gifts, talents, time, energy, etc. Of course, I can't force that, but that's my goal for them. Any other goal would fall short of the Word of God. Good post.


Camille said...

You are right Stacie...we ought not to EXPECT it! Remember what the Bible says about rebellion ~ "For rebellion is as the sin of witchcraft..." I Samuel 15:23a!!!

Oh that the LORD would give the needed daily grace to raise our children for HIS glory!

Thanks for sharing...these posts are a blessing to many I am sure!

In His Love,

RaD said...

Yay! You posted it! I loved this one!

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