Saturday, March 14, 2009

The Waiting


I guess my heart hasn't been into blogging as much lately. I am having a hard time just focusing on what I need to be doing. I am in that waiting phase. Each contraction (could it be the one that breaks my water?) teases me with the thought of the baby coming early. Its never happened before, so I don't know why I get my hopes up. I am still almost 3 weeks out.
My husband took the kids for me all morning yesterday so that I could just rest. I have a horrible cough right now and every time I have a coughing spasm it kills my stomach muscles and pelvic area. I'm trying to rest as much as I can.
God gets me through each day and I pray that I can make it through the next without completely falling apart emotionally. It's hard to be in chronic pain and have your spirit be joyful. I know that I am to rejoice in my trials, but when you are going through it, it feels more like you are surviving them, rejoicing is the furthest thing from your mind. Instead questions like "Why?" "Why now?" pop up. I guess that is where faith comes in. When you can't see the answer you just have to trust. So here I am, trusting you God. Waiting for fruit to come forth. Waiting for a new baby to hold in my arms and to nurse. I am here waiting...

4 comments:

OurLilFullFam said...

I know, those last couple weeks really are preparing you aren't they?

The pain in the hips, legs (calfs) round ligaments, contractions, I get that nasty nasty heartburn/reflux that once burned a little hole in my throat, the lack of sleep, etc. I try to use that time to pray and grow closer to the Lord, and thank Him for my new blessing, but it is so hard because the lack of rest and the added pains make it hard. But, it is short lived and so worth it. I pray you can get some rest and have a healthy baby in your arms very very soon!

Cat said...

Remember when Beth said that waiting on something (this baby, perhaps) is exhausting, but waiting on the Lord our strength is renwewed. I'm only 4'11, Stacie, and carried Kelly 3 weeks past his due date. I was bigger laying down than I was standing up! My goodness he could walk by himself home from the hospital by the time he finally popped out at 8 pounds. I KNOW your struggle! And I pray for you throughout each and every day, and in the night when I'm awake with hot flashes. You ARE prayed up; REST! Rest in the Lord and know that He is there. Call out to Him, call out to those who love you too. We want to hear from you, darlin'.

Naomi said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Naomi said...

Praying for you Stacie. I am so sorry to hear you are in such pain. Not long to go now and you will have a beautiful babe. You can do this. This is what God planned for you.

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