Thursday, March 12, 2009

No Longer the Baby

It is really starting to hit me. As Jacob and I were snuggling on the couch this morning, I realized that for only a short few weeks, he will be the main focus of my attention. He will no longer be the baby and his little world is going to be rocked when I start nursing an infant full-time. I wonder how I'm going to do it. How is this little guy that just loves to be carried from his playpen, waits on patiently on the couch while I get his milk in the morning and then immediately wants to just snuggle with me on my lap while he drinks it, going to handle it? Honestly, he is the most jealous child I've ever had. If I'm holding anyone else's baby he immediately wants "up". He'll try to push that baby away, too.

Steve has always been so amazing after a baby is born. He really has a heart for making that that toddler that's been "replaced" feel special. He gives them tons of attention and takes them everywhere with him. It makes the transition so much smoother and I am grateful.

There is a sadness to know that he is not going to look so small anymore. He is going to look huge compared to that tiny infant. My expectations of him will change and my job for the next year is to makes sure that the infant is safe from the toddler. The toddler is so naturally curious that you have to watch them like a hawk around the baby to prevent them from poking their eyes, trying to pick them up, swinging them to fast; you name it! It is scary! Whenever I shower I bring the baby in the bathroom with me. I never let it sleep in his bassinet while a toddler is running around! I don't know, maybe it will be different now that I have two older children to help me.

Jacob is saying more and more words, which helps reduce his screaming and he is getting less frustrated. I am enjoying that! He is even copying the kids while they homeschool. We went out to eat today and he showed an interest in the coloring crayons and thought he was hot stuff as he tried to scribble a picture. It's nice that he can be more easily entertained.

I'm so ready for this baby, but that means changes and I need to truly prepare myself for them. I think I've been trying not to think about them too much. Crud, I haven't even packed an overnight bag for the hospital yet! Maybe I'll get to that today.

The baby has dropped low and is making it very painful and difficult to move as it's head feels stuck in my pelvis. I think the best thing to do is to do as little as possible the next few weeks and try to rest. I really don't have much of a choice. Steve has been most helpful when he's home.
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CB said...

I didn't even have mine packed when I went into labor this last time!! I had to do it between contractions, lol. I will be more prepared the next time, since that honestly wasn't too pleasant!! I am just like you when I am pregnant...I begin to mourn the "baby" not being the baby anymore. It is amazing how well the new one always seems to fit in though! I LOL'ed when you gave me a visual of the toddler picking up the baby & swinging him/her. I have such fat babies that there is no fear of that happening around here! My 7 & 8 yr olds can barely pick up our baby!! Hee hee!
Oh & I thought for sure our 4th was going to be the ONE jealous baby. He had shown signs of jealousy whenever I had someone elses baby & acted like he "owned" me...was even upset if I'd hold my older daughter in my lap! But, he has not been that way with the baby. He accepted him from day first, with curiosity. But, he seemed to understand how helpless the baby was.

Even today, he is more gentle & kind to him than he is to any of the older siblings (or dog too, for that matter). I am surprised at him! Maybe yours will surprise you too!

I am SO excited for you!! Take it easy & I pray you get another wonderful night's sleep!!!!!

Cat said...

Oh, you have a story in Jacob, don't you?! I look forward to how this all unfolds when you come home with the new baby, Stacie. Kelly was so upset with me when I brought Kimber home that I turned my high-backed rocker around to face a corner and encouraged him to through his stuffed animals at me. He did...once. Then he was fine. He was only 19 months old and didn't understand, but soon picked up the new routine and loved her well.

Cheesemakin' Mamma said...

I'm praying he'll do fine with the new baby. I'm also praying God will sustain you during these last few weeks. It won't be long! I wish I was closer so I could help more.

Rachel and Family said...

Your post makes me want to cry!! You're so right that they just seem so big next to a helpless newborn. But, if it wasn't to be, God wouldn't make it so. My little Hannah is already potty training and has been moving out of her role as "baby" with her bed and everything. I hope she handles the real thing well! Maybe her and Jacob can start a toddler support group! ha!ha!

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