Sunday, March 27, 2011

Are You Thirsty?

I found this in the archives today. I was astounded when I reread this post. I am feeling the exact same way today. I couldn't have expressed it any differently. So here it is again...

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I have been thirsty lately. I mean really thirsty. I can't seem to get enough of God's Word. If I have time to read something, I pick up a good Christian book that helps me better myself. I am praying more, finding that time to lift up people and prayer petitions to God.

It makes me a little nervous, though. I wonder what God is preparing me for. Everything I'm reading seems to be on contentment, the value of friendship, staying plugged into God, and pressing in towards Him when He seems distant.

The funny thing is, is He does seem distant right now. I can't explain it or put my finger on it. I haven't heard His voice in a while, not that direct, knock-you-down-with-a-feather voice that makes you wonder how He knows you so intimately. He has been speaking to me through books, Scriptures and circumstances. I know He's there, guiding me and leading me, but it feels like He's letting me develop my faith in Him more, but not just giving me the answer right away.

A lot of issues in my life right now are not going to be resolved in the next few days. The things I'm praying for like my children's Walks with God, my husband's health, my children's attitudes, how to manage my growing family and household are all things that are going to take time. I am waiting on the Lord with expectant hope. That is all I can do.

In the meantime, I trust, live my life as best I can with what I have, and try to adjust my attitudes and actions to what I know to be Biblical and pleasing to God. I fail everyday. But I am determined to not go in my own strength, but in His. I KNOW this pleases Him even if I don't FEEL that affirmation from Him everyday.

I think that is why I'm thirsty, too. I want His affirmation more then my husband's, children's, sister's, parents, and friends. I want to know He is pleased with me as a wife, mother, friend, daughter and more important just me, plain old me. The me that is stripped away of all her roles. The me that was at that retreat a month ago and discovered again some of what she is without her roles. An artist, a cook, a reader, a nature lover, and a child of God.

Are you thirsty? Drink, drink until you are satisfied, if you aren't satisfied, you haven't drank enough!

9 comments:

Cheesemakin' Mamma said...

Sounds like you are doing exactly what you need to be doing. Love Ya!

Cat said...

Isn't it amazing when God answers big prayers? The ones where we ask to be drawn closer to Him, for Him to give us a heart for his Word? The same thing is happening to me, Stacie! I have checked out library books repeatedly and taken them back unread because I can't get into them. I can only get into my "betterment" books. God has given me a thirst for contentment, for Old Testament knowledge, for going deeper in my walk. It is truly wonderful!

Caribbean Shulamite said...

your post reminds me i haven't been drinking enough, not even close - THANK YOU!

Stacie, A Firefighter's Wife said...

Let us all continue to press deeper!

Mich said...

I am there with you friend. Craving God.

Lady Rose said...

Stacie,

This was a wonderful testimony in regards to your heart-felt walk with God.

I can relate to this post on several levels, as God is always stretching me to grow and learn, even during times of uncertainty.

You are not alone, Dear Sister. Please know that you are not alone!

Blessings,

-LR

Cheesemakin' Mamma said...

Do you remember now what God was preparing you for?

Stacie, A Firefighter's Wife said...

I think He was preparing me for having six children. I think I only had 5 at that point. Adjusting my life, making sure I was leaning on Him, especially with Josh and Marcus in the "tween" years.

Rachel and Family said...

I loved looking at the cake goodies! I've always wanted a cupcake stand... and I treated myself (for Paul's birthday!) a few weeks ago. It was so much fun and now I can't wait to use it for Easter. So much easier than cutting up a cake! Tell the kids I thought their cakes turned out beautiful!

Go Scrapbookers! You are leaving such special memories for your descendants!

I remember your devotional and am glad to have read it again. You have a good way of putting things.

xoxoxo

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